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The Best (Read: The Worst) Of Walmart

Prepare To Hurl

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By far the nastiest picture of a Walmart customer EVER! Between the full on poop stain and period-blood soaked leg-sleeve, you should be puking right about… NOW!

MY EYES!!

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The girl, not too shabby. The clothing, absolutely hideous. But the girl makes up for it, so it’s okay.

That Poor, Poor Husband

Don’t know how this thing got married. Whoever did so is probably blind, deaf, and mute. Too bad they weren’t infertile.

At Least She Wipes

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The good new is that this lady wipes after going to the bathroom. The bad news, you’re seeing it!

Double Back Butt

It’s like she was a triplet in the womb, but then absorbed her siblings right into her back. Disgusting to the highest degree. Ewww!

All You Ever Need

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All you ever need in life, printed on her shirt. Looks like this lady has life figured out!

Nice Goatee, Lady

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Hey, some people have hormonal imbalances. They mostly shop at Walmart. What a surprise.

A Bit Top Heavy

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This guy should have paid attention in physics class. If your vehicle is top heavy, don’t lean out too far… especially if YOU’RE the “top-heavy” part!

Never Would Have Guessed

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Sometimes, people get tattoos that are just not necessary. Dude, we already know! Believe us!

There Is No God

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Somebody, PLEASE put this “lady” out of her misery. On the up-side, she’s got a place to store her things in those saddlebags!

Horror Unleashed

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The Texas Chainsaw Massacre is real! This horror was unleashed upon Walmart. Many people died.

Time To Go On Safari

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We’re hoping they’re giving out cheetah-hunting licenses this year. We’ve already spotted a couple that need a good shootin’.

At Least She’s Trying

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Best dressed Walmart customer EVER! At least she’s trying to look her best.

Thunder Thighs

Unholy mother of Satan! This lady needs to liposuction her liposuction. Twice!

There’s Style… And Then There’s STYLE!

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Some people are just fashion-forward and understand style. Then there’s people like this lady who are masters!

Great Parking!

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There are times when you are in such a hurry, the store is the only viable place to park. Literally INSIDE THE STORE!

Half Combover

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From the front, it looks like he has all his hair. Too bad he didn’t have an extra mirror to see the back…

Lickathesplit? No Thank You

Here’s my first hurl. I managed to keep it in thus far. But “lickathesplit?” Not if my life depended on it!

Cowguuurrrl

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Heeeey guuuurl! You’re looking mighty fine for a fat chick. Hey, wait a minute! You’re not a… ah, what the hell.

The Truth

The truth can be hard to handle. But that is definitely a bad ass. Bad as in not good. Yuck.

Walmart Tramp Stamp

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Wow. We’ve always hated tramp stamps. But we hate this Walmart tramp stamp the most. And on a guy? Huuurl!

Sagging Pants Back In Style?

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Is there no decency left in this country? Who in their right mind would put on tiny pants that don’t even cover 1/4 of their butt? Oh yeah, a Walmart customer… duh!

DAT SHELF!

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Baby got shelf! As in, for her kid to stand on! I can feel my lunch coming up… again…

Little Girly Mann!

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This little girly mann has been pumping up with Hanz und Franz! Look at his little girly muscles!

Mad Max ‘Do

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Someone was obviously impressed with the post-apocalyptic hairstyles in the new Mad Max movie.

Forever Damaged

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No amount of psychiatric help with undo the damaged caused to this kid in the moment captured in this picture. Maybe LSD would help.

Just A Tad Saggy

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We’re having a hard time deciding whether these are saggy boobs or very convenient love handles… You decide!

Bad Case Of FUPA

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Some girls have nice butts, but this chick has two of ’em. One in back, and another really big one in front!

Plumber’s Crack

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I think I know why the drain is clogged. Hair. Lots and lots of hair in that plumber’s crack.

Subtle Hair

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As a guy, sometimes it’s hard to notice when your girlfriend has changed her hairstyle. This girl’s man does NOT have that problem!

The South Shall Rise Again… At Walmart

150 years after the end of the American Civil War, it might be time to give up the idea that the South Shall Rise Again… until you go to Walmart and come to the realization that it might actually happen!

I’m Confused

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Not sure what I should be feeling right about now. Girl? Guy? One thing I know for sure, I need to get some mayo.

A Little Stainy

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Obviously, NO ONE told this lady that there’s a bathroom at Walmart. Or maybe they did, and she saw it, and then decided it was better to just poop her pants.

Punk Fish Net

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No one asked ANYONE to bring back the 80’s. It’s a bad idea from the get-go. Look at the picture for direct proof!

Not Trying To Be Racist, But…

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We’re not trying to be racist here, but this guy is definitely doing his job upholding the stereotypes. Single-handedly.

Back Saddlebags

Satan, please take me now! Why Satan? Because he would never allow something like this to ruin the aesthetic high standards of Hell.

Drawnbrows

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Ladies, what makes you think that “drawnbrows” look good? This is a fad that just HAS to go away!

Dental Hygiene

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Wow, looking good there, girl! In case you didn’t know, Walmart sells toothpaste, toothbrushes AND floss!

Blurred Gender Lines

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We’re not judging this guy’s sexual orientation… to each his own. But we ARE judging his style! Terrible, just terrible!

Appropriate Clothing

Some clothing choices might seem like a good idea, until you realize they aren’t. We like it, but not at Walmart.

Back Saddlebags 2: The Sequel

We’re not exactly sure, but this seems like a case of indecent exposure… or do nipples have to show before it’s considered breaking the law?

Black Friday

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The worst American holiday, right here… Black Friday. The day after we give thanks for all we have, we go psycho for stuff we don’t need!

Just Like At Home

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This guy made himself at home at Walmart. No really, this is exactly how he looks when he’s at home.

Sexy Gocart

Ooo, now that’s some sexy go carting! Which reminds me, I need to pick up some floss… I have a hair stuck in-between my teeth!

Aisle Rumble

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Way to go, Mother-of-the-year! This fabulous mom decided to teach her kid a much needed lesson, how to beat someone in a Walmart aisle… a lesson every kid needs!

$9 Twilight Shirts? SCORE!

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BOGO, that’s pretty nice. Frequent flyer miles, love ’em. $9 Twilight T-shirt, BEST SALE EVAR!

Color Coordination

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I consider myself someone who knows how to color coordinate my clothing, but this man is a prodigy!

This Ain’t The Toilet

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This guy need to realize he’s not at home and he’ll actually have to make it to the bathroom before he “goes.”

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